Fortune Teller: Good fortune awaits you, my good man. You’ll travel to various places like France, London, San Francisco, Somalia, Zanzibar, Alaska… and you’ll have homes in each and every one of those places. Also, this blog of yours will strike gold and make you famous!
Me: Wow. You’re not kidding me, are you?
Fortune Teller: I kid not. It also says here that you’ll make it big and earn billions of pesos and you’ll end up as one of the richest men in the Philippines in five years’ time!
Me: No way.
Fortune Teller: Afterwards, you’ll take five years traveling and meditating in India, where you’ll discover fire, be enlightened, and become a guru. Then you’ll write a best-seller named “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People — In Yoga!”. Also, you’ll be as thin as Gandhi. And you’ll also change your name to “Mohandas”. Then you’ll become a big Bollywood star.
Me: Okaaaaaay.
Fortune Teller: And when you’re finished with your obsession with Indians, meditation, yoga, and self-help, you’ll migrate to New York, where you’d make enough capital to launch Microsoft. Then you’d invent necessities such as the vaccum cleaner and the iPod. And when you get bored with all the money you will earn, you’ll hide away in a secluded log cabin and invent the internet!
Me: Holy shit… really?
Fortune Teller: OH MY GOD YOU ARE SUCH AN AWESOME! Father my children!!11
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